PROGRESS THIS OCTOBER

Many things had occured this month. If I were to summarised everything, it would be a grateful feeling that I never felt before. 

Early of this month, Mama went into emergency red zones for having fever 39 celcius and  vomitting. Been suspected for covid as cases in country spike up suddenly. Mama being isolated from us for two days in isolation wardngAfter the test result were determined and confirmed negative mama being transfered into wad 8 tengah timur. and i stay for one night to accompany her. Then she was discharge. Alhamdulillah.  

Today is one year annivesarry of Atok went to Rahmatullah. Mama cooks a meal for her aunty and request me to bring her there. 

Yesterday, I remember I had a good feelings to tell somehow I forgot how. Oh yeah, I went to tuition class for teaching and have a small talk with Kak Azie and realised that I am older and more mature and more grown up. Before I rebels too much, but now I can see the new me trying to accept everythings happen on me slowly. 

I find reasons in everything and took much time to consolidate and that somehow gives me too much stress. Many times I told myself too accept everything but it did not really work. 

But I learnt to spent my energy on somewhere else. Lately i have been into a kpop group which I think i will stop liking them in just a few months after. Their songs really comforts me in a certain way. 

It made me thinks that out there, there are people struggling and sacrifices just like you. you are not alone. Keep hanging on Allah and keep asking Him to return you a magnificent strength and faith towards Him. 

I have conducted my MBTI test lately and I found that my personality is quite introverted. but still adventerous. i mean that is how I feel all the time. so the test encourages me to expose myself a bit more as I have some knowledges about myself. ISFP. 

For adult like me now, money is always the main problems. I wanted to things but still dont have courage on that. i am never mingle around right people and dont even have right peoplw to show it to me. But I think of that is what things are gonna spin around me. first I have to accept it first. 

I hope, there will many more friends or people who are willing to spend their playing times with me. I really wanna sweat out but my ways would be interrupt people surrounding me too much. 

Me myself have too much lackings and I will fix it slowly. 

These day, I am interested in learning many new things and want to di many new things that i dont have courage and dont want to do during in my study days. 

I told you dear self, I am slowly changing. As for my study days, I am too timid and rigid to only study and rarely having funs with my friends, but i will never regret it. that was me back in those days and I am gonna cherised it forever. 

These day,i find playing with people and migle around can shift you stress away by sweating out. that is why i am desperately wanna go out and meet people. I am influenced by what i put my interest in during that present. 

i am gonna love my present and trying to learn many things as many possible. thank you. till next times.